Marissa Gets it Right
I’ve been a big Marissa fan ever since "My Cousin Vinny." Last week, Marissa shocked the business community by staying at Yahoo! another week. Though evidently as the warden she is a bit lonely. Last Friday, employees of Yahoo! received a summons stating “speed and quality are often sacrificed when we work from home. We need to be one Yahoo!, and that starts with physically being together.”
Yes, the era of home and remote teleworking at Yahoo! has come to an end. It is time to get back to work – not the activity, but the place. No more lollygagging at home watching "Ellen" in your pajamas. Shockingly, some of the employees are upset about this, but their complaints only reveals their chagrin. If employees really wanted a work-remote option, they should have worked harder.
Marissa gets it, and that’s probably why she only took two weeks off for maternity leave. Who can get anything done with all that baby crying? Some believe that this is just a cost-cutting measure. But that isn’t likely as the new policy will result with more wear and tear on the facilities, more HVAC, and a lot more paper (printer and toilet).
Marissa is working hard to get the company’s stock price and culture back to an earlier time. There are many changes afoot. Yahoo! is rumored to be looking at a new BYOD policy that supports both Swingline and Bostitch, and the company store has a new line of Members Only jackets. Yahoo also announced that employees who stay in the office for 25 years will earn a gold colored seat cushion.
Working remotely is not efficient or effective. That’s why all staff should be commuting to the office in the name of productivity. Internet companies are not the only ones to go astray, and Marissa provides a model for other industries to follow. Teachers are assigning too much homework to our kids. If it is important, it should be done at school. It’s also time to get those astronauts off the International Space Station for proper supervision. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it isn’t what you do, it’s what people see you do.
The move is expected to save Yahoo! a fortune in cell phone costs and salaries. Remember, the last one out should close things up (and grab a to-go cup: coffee is for closers).
Perhaps someday things will be different. Perhaps there will be a time where a person’s output is how we measure their productivity and work ethic. Perhaps someday the technology will exist that allows remote workers to connect, contribute, and collaborate as effectively (or better) than being on-site. Perhaps remote working will be valued by both employee and employer as it offers both sides strong benefits. Perhaps that someday is today? Nah, that’s just silly.